According to an American national survey, divorce takes place ‘‘every 13 seconds’’ in the United States, resulting in an alarming ‘‘2,419,196 divorces per year’’. About ‘‘2.2 million people got married in the EU-28 in 2015’’, Eurostat says. The same year records almost a million (‘‘946,000’’) divorces. ”Systematic estimates of divorce across 33 countries in sub-Saharan Africa show over 20% of first unions end in divorce within 20 years in over two-thirds of the countries’’ (Shelley Clark & Sarah Brauner-Otto, 2015).


Marriage is a beautiful project. But it can be tricky. How do you approach marriage in your context? I compiled a series of topics to reflect on. Go through the list below and comment on which topics trouble you the most.


God’s will

God wants me to marry a person He guides me to

I can marry any person I want and choose


I can marry, divorce and remarry as I want

Marriage is a onetime decision, for better and for worse

Time factor

There is a time and season to meet your spouse

I can make things happen on my own

Divine Compatibility

            I should marry a believer God prepared and leads me to

            I should marry someone from my country, race or church


            I have savings, a house, a job and other material things

            I meditate and live by 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 daily


            Husband and wife should screen each other regularly

            Both should do their part of Godly instructions


            I can pressure my spouse and help change his/her dirty habits

            I play my role, pray and help when I can. God does the rest

Meeting point

            I must meet my spouse in a spirit-filled environment

            I can meet my spouse anywhere God wants


            The Holy Spirit guides me to my spouse

            I can follow my intuitions. People can advise me

First step

            A man must always make the first step

            Whether man or woman, let the Holy Spirit guide to inquire


            Dating is worldly. Men or elders should meet parents

            As the Holy Spirit leads in your context


            Reason, get opinions and suggestions from people

            Inquire from God by the Holy Spirit’s help


            I’m allowed to divorce. Moses permitted it. Jesus too

            I’m not allowed to divorce. Jesus and the Apostles oppose it


            God doesn’t bring two in a union to separate later

            If things aren’t working, flee for your life


            Admit you’re wrong, trust God to fix the situation

            Don’t get stuck. Divorce and move on. Time is precious


            I must accept responsibility for my actions

            No, I can blame others for my situation


            Only in case of death or when my unbelieving spouse leaves

            I can remarry whenever the current marriage isn’t working

Death of spouse

            Immediately look for another one. There’re many out there

            Analyse your situation. Determine if it’s worth to remarry


            They’re very weak. Men can manipulate them as they want

            Different from men. Possess powers to lift or bring down a man


            Reconcile. Don’t seek to remarry

            Remarry whoever you want

Immaturity, Inexperience & carelessness

            Are enough justification for divorce and remarriage

            God requires sincere inquiry from childhood

God’s position

            In rejecting divorce, God hates the divorced & punishes them

            In refuting divorce, God promotes true faithfulness & love 

 Already Remarried

            Move on with the current one, don’t divorced/remarry again

            Divorce again and reconcile with the first, come what may


Share with others in your community

Book Coming Soon ”Before You Marry” explores these topics in depth. The link will be communicated. 



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